Wednesday, June 13, 2012

What does a Healthy Relationship Look Like?

Today are some good "secular" insights for what a healthy relationship looks like, and tomorrow, please stop back, as I will be posting some Godly insights for good relationships...wish promise to be even better!  Enjoy!  And, feel free to pass these on to someone you know who needs a yardstick in choosing well. 

What is Healthy?

You each respect the other’s opinions, thoughts, needs, and desires.

You each can work to find solutions which benefit you both. You each take care of both yourself and your partner.

You are free to be you, and your partner is free to be himself/herself- including freely sharing what makes you each unique individuals.

Differences are respected, and issues are resolved through respectful give and take of each other’s needs.

You and your partner are free to make decisions as to how you will live, where you will go, and what you will do without controlling pressure from the other.

You and your partner can trust each other, be completely truthful with each other, and feel safe in both the ways you share and the way your sharing is received.

Your thoughts and words are listened to and validated. You can take responsibility for your own feelings and actions without fear of pain, ridicule, or abuse.

You respect each other’s personal boundaries.  You resolve conflicts with words and not verbal, physical, or psychological abuse.

You are proud of who you are in your relationship, and do not compromise your values, viewpoints, or sense of right and wrong for the other.

What is Unhealthy?  You are physically, socially, emotionally, or mentally abused or abusive.

You are fearful to express your own viewpoints or feel the need to sneak around and tell lies for fear of reprisal, or this applies to your partner.

You need to defend your beliefs, needs, and viewpoints without being listened to and/or without being respected as you do so, or your partner experiences this.

You are forced or strongly encouraged into taking actions or engaging in actions which you would prefer not to, or you do this to your partner.

You feel trapped, voice-less, unimportant, or insignificant, or your partner does. Your partner criticizes or tears you down, or you do that to your partner.

You are isolated from community, family, friends, or activities you used to enjoy, or your partner is. Your partner blames you for all problems in the relationship, or you blame your partner for them.